Someone Mansplained Feminism to Me on Tinder

First off, I know *sigh* Tinder. I’m not really on Tinder, I just haven’t deleted my account, I don’t swipe ever anymore, I don’t really talk to anyone. This bro just needed a reply. Also, if you don’t know what mansplaining is, it is when a man (or bro) explains something, typically a woman, in a condescending or patronizing manner. Alright, now that you know what means let’s go with the story.

So yes, I was mansplained on Tinder by a guy who began the conversation by saying, “Agree with your whole bio except for the last part.” FYI, my bio is the typical list bio that details my love of leather jackets, brunch, coffee, concerts, and books. The added tidbit that this mansplainer (I also called him a meninist) didn’t care for reads, “Feminist, whether you like it or not.” Sorry for these shouty capitals but CLEARLY I DON’T CARE. To this fun message, I responded “good for you.” Clearly, I don’t care that he didn’t like or “agree” with me being a feminist, but he proceeded to poke and prod me about what feminism is and what my definition of feminism is.

Pause. The simple plain definition of feminism is to seek the equality between the sexes. That’s the simple definition. But once you go deeper and study the intersectionality in feminism, you see the extreme differences between races, sexualities, and gender identification.

So I placated this meninist and explained that I saw feminism as seeking equality between the sexes, races, sexualities, and different gender identities. Apparently, he didn’t agree with this because he began mansplaining what feminism is to me AFTER asking what my definition of feminism is. First off, why bother asking my opinion if you’re just going to correct my own beliefs and thoughts. I’m sorry, but please don’t insult my feminism. Everyone has their own definition of feminism and that was mine. What angers me so much is that he tried to explain how my beliefs and ideas were wrong in some way.

I’m unapologetic about being a feminist. Everyone who knows me knows that. Being a feminist is deeply rooted in who I am as a human being. Let’s not get into how everyone should be a feminist, but everyone should be respectful of the beliefs of others. I could talk about my feminism forever, but I won’t.

So shoutout to all the meninists and mansplainers in the world. You fuel me and all the feminists in the world to keep going. Please stop interrupting and mansplaining. You’re only making yourself look worse.


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